There's Something Missing

Yesterday was Thursday and the first time that I saw my roommate all week, which as you may very well know was fine by me.

She recently confided in me that she had gotten in a fight with her dad over the amount of money she had been spending on things that didn't matter at school. I of course, sided with the dad on this one. Eating out 3 times a day when you've already paid for food through school, driving a mile out of your way to get a drink from QuikTrip before every class and making it a habit to spend upwards of $50 at Target every other day is grounds for my strong opinion on that.

When she came home yesterday toting 3 shopping bags I just had to turn around and roll my eyes. The words that continued out of her mouth went something like this (my thoughts in quotations):

I've had the worst week ever, I had to go to the hospital because there's something wrong with my back so now I'm on a bunch of medication. So that's why I haven't been here all week because I've been at home because that bed's more comfortable. I crashed my car and now I'm gonna have to get it fixed next week so I won't be able to drive all next week because it'll be in the shop(as the roommate in this situation I'm really looking forward to that, not. I may just have to find somewhere else to be all next week). My boyfriend (of like 3 weeks) broke up with me (for like the 3rd time) and so I went out and bought a new pair of high heels(she's not supposed to wear heels because she had surgery on her foot) a new outfit, and hair dye so that I could 'get him back' but I'm gonna make him work for it(yeah like she made him work for everything else?).

And I just couldn't help but think to myself; There is something missing in this girls life, and it's actually quite sad. What can you do when you see someone who doesn't know their own selfworth? Someone who reduces themselves to who their boyfriend is at the time, what they can buy or what they can do to make themselves a hotter commodity? In a trying time in her life like this week, when everything under the sun seemed to be going wrong she turned to material things. But how much more comforted would she feel if she turned to God? For Him to hold her in His arms and be reassured that everything woud be just fine. Christ loves her just as she is. Christ loves her a heck of a lot more than I even like her. But I guess that's the beautiful thing. I just wish she could see it, I want her to know how much she is loved just because she is her. She doesn't need to buy new outfits and dye her hair. She doesn't need cheetah print high heels, a fixed car or even a boyfriend because no matter what happens, no matter what she does, Christ will always love her.

Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss.

ACE

As I've blogged about before I'm not a huge fan of the animal kingdom. But even I, the non-lover of animals, have fallen for a few. 

Until recently I can't remember a time where our family didn't have a dog, and I mean at least one. Growing up we had greyhounds and then the greyhounds had more greyhounds and for a second there I thought we were running a racetrack. Those dogs although fun to run around with were never truly my pets.

Johnny was the first dog I think I truly considered my pet. I was pretty young throughout his whole life so I don't remember much about him except that he was a short fat little beagle whom I loved. I remember thinking that I hadn't seen Johnny for awhile and then someone in my family telling me that they didn't think he would be coming back. That was rough because I was experiencing my first pet loss.

Ace!

Then came Ace, the little doggy light of my life. I remember getting him and he was just a puppy, I'd slip him into my tutu's and carry him around in a wicker basket. I'd let him chew on my jelly sandals and love him to the max. Ace was always there. He was in the yard waiting for you when you were driving home and he was at the door waiting for you when you'd come outside. He'd retrieve countless numbers of softballs that were over/underthrown so that we didn't have to. Ace was my tanning partner on my roof in the middle of the summer and my walking companion because there was no way you were gonna catch me walking alone in the country! (I've seen those snakes and I hear those coyotes at night, don't think that I don't!)

Ace was the dream dog, the worst thing I ever remember him doing is dragging his 'hunt' into the yard (talk about gross!). I loved to look out on the deck and see Ace curled up in the shade sleeping and our cat curled up on top of Ace sleeping. He was a lover. When Ace died this past summer it was extremely hard on our whole family.

My oldest brother Jeremy with Ace

When I started writing this I had no intention of tying it to God. But in reality everything is tied to Him. He is at the center of all that is good. Not that I'm trying to say that God is like my dog, but reminiscing on my memories with Ace I'm reminded of how God is always with us.

Just as Ace waited for me to drive into the driveway, get out of my car and followed me until I got in the house and then ran to the window to watch from the inside so does God. He is always there waiting for me to come home, to come home to Him.

When Ace knew that I was about to go inside and stop petting him and playing with him and leave him he'd give you that look. You know? That look; that 'stay with me a little longer, I love you, I want to play with you!' look. I imagine that that's the way our Lord looks at us when we leave Him. He wants to be with us and it fills Him with joy when we choose to be with Him.

When I would go inside, even if it were for 5 minutes, once I opened that door and stepped outside again it was like Ace was having a party for my return. He was so happy to see me and he'd long forgotten about my leaving him. It's a lot like the Parable of the Prodigal Son. The prodigal son left his father and wasted everything that he had given him. When the son returned the father wasn't angry at him but rejoiced that his son was back and threw a party. Our Lord loves that we spend time with him. And even though sometimes we leave Him, He is always ready to welcome us back with open arms. He loves us unwaveringly and that is enough.

My older brother Russ with Ace and Tyler



A Guy Who's SUPER-Into His Church

I'd be lying to myself if I said I wasn't a little outraged when I read a link from the Glamour twitter account.

The question proposed was:

"Should I Consider Marrying a Guy Who's SUPER-Into His Church?"

Before I even read what came after this question I was already upset that there has come a point in our society where a man that is 'SUPER-Into His Church' would be a reason NOT to marry him. For me that would definitely go on the PRO side of the pro/con list. The first paragraph of her letter read like this:

"I’m in love with the MOST amazing man! We have so much in common, and the best part is, he accepts me for who I am.
Here’s my concern: He does a LOT of volunteer work through his church, which takes a lot of time from me."

Whoa now! Since when did volunteering become a bad thing?! She has this most amazing man. A man she shares so much in common with and a man that accepts her as she is.

So here is my problem with this entire thing: Why can't she accept him for who he is? Actually, why can't she accept him for who he is in HIM, our Lord. To have a fiance that is dedicated to God and willing to spend his life working for Him is a gift. Isn't this a trait that you'd want your husband to be able to pass down to your children. A husband that not only talks the talk but walks the walk?

I guess the most disheartening part of the whole thing was when she complained about how his volunteering takes time away from her. His life is dedicated to doing what God asks and hers is dedicated to doing what she asks. While he is worrying about those that are less fortunate she is worrying about herself.

I don't write about this to degrade her or to judge her as a person. In my Theology of the Body class this evening our instructor talked to us about judging. There are three things that people judge in this world and only two of them are okay.

1. You can judge words.
2. You can judge actions.
3. You cannot judge people.

He explained it like this: If you were a teacher and a child took a test and answered a question wrong you would have to mark it wrong. You would have to judge the words. If this same student threw a rock at another kid at recess and you saw him you would have to give him the appropriate punishment. You would judge his actions. You wouldn't however, judge the student. You would never go up to the student and tell him that he is a horrible person because you do not know his soul.

I don't judge this woman but I do judge her words. I'm not deeming her a horrible person, what she said was just very selfish. But she is a child of God and I hope that through her fiance's work in Him she will find God and His will and know that by working for Him her fiance is doing what is best for the both of them.

Why Saint Genevieve?

This is a question I get quite often.

When it came time to pick a Saint for my Confirmation this was not something that I took lightly. Just ask my mother, I spent days in front of the computer looking up the life stories of every Saint under the sun to find the PERFECT one.

There are many websites out there that can tell you the life story of Genevieve which was remarkable in itself, but there were a few inspirations and one story in particular that led me to choose Saint Genevieve to be my Patron Saint.

Inspiration #1

St.Genevieve was born in the year 422 as a peasant girl in the small village. (I'm from a small village!) When She was 7 years old St.Germanus made a stop in Genevieve's village where crowds flocked to welcome him. He was drawn to Genevieve's devotion and thoughtfulness. Before he left the next morning he renewed Genevieve's consecration, blessed her and gave her a medal with a cross engraved in it. This was to remind her of her dedication to Christ and she was to wear it instead of pearls and gold necklaces or bracelets. For those of you that know me you may recollect that I rarely wear jewelry but it would be rare for you to catch me on a day where I'm not wearing my St.Genevieve medal and Holy Spirit dove around my neck.

Inspiration #2
She liked to go to church alone at night, praying by candlelight. One night, a gust of wind blew out her candle, and she accredited this to the devil trying to frighten her.  It's a well known fact that I'm a night-owl so it shouldn't come as a surprise that some of my most fruitful prayer comes in the middle of the night when darkness is around me. It is nice to know that when I ask she is there in the night praying for and with me

Inspiration #3
Genevieve was devoted to works of charity and practiced multiple mortifications including a vegetarian diet and fasting on all days of the week except Sundays and Thursdays. She drank only water and her meals included small amounts of bread and beans. She followed this diet until she was 50 when she was counseled that it would be best for her to eat more frequently so she added only milk and fish to her diet. I fail miserably with mortification. I guess that's the point right, mortification isn't supposed to be easy. Genevieve lived this as a part of her daily life. When I am struggling to make it even one day I turn to her prayers and support.

The story that led me to choose Saint Genevieve
In the year 451 when the Huns were marching towards Paris the citizens were ready to run in terror. It was Genevieve who persuaded them to stay. God had spoken to her and she told them that if they kept their faith in God, fasted, prayed and performed penance than the city would be protected by heaven and their lives would be spared. Some of the citizens did not believe her and when the Huns got closer to the city they fled out the back way which connected with a road that completely bypassed the city. Saint Genevieve and a group of people chose to stay. When the Huns arrived at Paris they decided not to take the city but to continue on the road that went around the city.

Because of Genevieve's trust in God she was saved. For this reason I chose her to be my Patron Saint. So many people were frightened and left. You could say it was the 'popular' thing to do. Genevieve knew that God would protect her and chose to stay. I pray that through the intercession of Saint Genevieve I will be able to listen to God, to do His will and to trust in Him to the extreme that Genevieve did. I pray that I may not succumb to what the world says is right as opposed to what the Lord says is right and know that no matter what if I do the will of God He will not lead me astray.

Her feast day is actually the same day as my oldest brother's birthday January 3rd!

Exodus 20:7

My mom often likes to remind me of this little thing my cousin's daughter Ashlyn said once.

"I say Oh My Goodness because Oh My Gosh sounds too much like the one you're not supposed to say."


How simple is that?

"You shall not take the name of the LORD, your God, in vain. For the LORD will not leave unpunished him who takes his name in vain." Exodus 20:7

Day 29: A picture that can always make you smile :)

Alright, so its not a picture its a video. You know those days? YOU know! those DAYS! Nothing seems to be going right, you were late to class, forgot about your assignments, didn't get enough sleep, feel like crud, stubbed your toe and it started raining while you're wearing flip flops and walking in mud.

Issue.

This beautiful girl is my youngest niece London. She's adorable and at the age of 2; HILARIOUS! On those days that I'm feeling like the world's against me, underachieved and underappreciated I watch this video and I'm reminded that there are more important things in life. I love this little girl, and knowing that she loves me back is more than enough.

I'm actually visiting my sister and her family today and I can't wait to hug my nieces tight and tell them how much I love them!

Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of

This may come as a surprise to all of you, but an animal person I am not. 

Sometimes when I say that out loud to people they look at me in shock, like HOW can I not be an animal person? EVERYBODY is an animal person. Let's set the record straight, it's not that hate animals I just prefer most of them behind a fence and on a leash.

I was raised on a farm and we had our fair share of animals; cows and calves, hogs, piggies, dogs, puppies, cats and kitties. And when I was little all of these animals were great! I got to bottle feed a calf every once and a while which was cool but kinda gross at the same time(so slobbery!).

My mom told me a story about when I was really little and my dad was moving hogs and the pen was really muddy. His boot must have been stuck in the mud and when the hogs kept coming he went over backwards and I just started crying and screaming 'the pigs ate my daddy!'

When I was a little older than that I was at my Aunt and Uncles house one night with my dad. My dad and uncle were looking at something, it could have been a cow/calf but my memory is a little hazy. I had been playing with their dog and was down petting him when it happened. I was a gonner, buh-bye animal kingdom, no way, no how, ain't gonna happen. HE BIT ME! Right on my upper lip on which I still have a little scar to this day.

From that moment on I was deathly afraid of dogs. DOGS! Big dogs, small dogs, white dogs, black dogs, solid color dogs, spotted dogs, loud dogs, quiet dogs, yippy dogs, barking dogs, dogs. I couldn't take a step in to my best friend Brittany's house in Elementary/Jr.High without making her put her Golden Retriever Summer in a separate room while I made a mad dash up the stairs away from her.

I'm 20 now and I still curl my hands up in a fist when dogs start sniffing around me, I just don't trust their mouth and my fingers in the same general vicinity. Oh and don't even get me started on doggy kisses, there is no way. that I'm ever going to let a dog get that close to my mouth on purpose ever again. NO. WAY.